Bad Movies And How to Spot Them. Every Time.

Last Updated on August 12, 2024

I’ve never been wrong about a bad movie, and now you won’t either…

You open up Netflix with a beautifully large bowl of popcorn sitting in your lap, waiting to be eaten. After a quick scroll through, you see something that catches your eye. You go through the mental checklist:

• Your favorite trope…
• Handsome love interest…
• AND a period piece!

With excitement, your finger hovers over the ‘Play’ button…

Stop right there!

With all the different streaming apps and options now, it can be so easy to get tired of scrolling and just choose the first thing that looks half interesting. But your time is money!

No, Nicole. Heartbreak does not “feel good in a place like this.“

I have spotted every single crappy movie before it even started. Without failure, they all show one of these “tells” in the trailers.

Here are the biggest tells of a bad movie that you should watch out for! But first…

A (Unfortunately Necessary) Disclaimer:

These are my opinions as someone who’s strictly interested in the writing and storytelling that goes into producing a movie. This is the opinion of someone who has lost hundreds of hours of my life to bad movies that I will unfortunately never get back.

That was when I was younger, and didn’t know any better or felt a familial obligation to sit through the whole thing. Now, I just leave or tell my parents ‘no.’

This is not a discussion of taste or budget: if you like those B-rated Tubi movies (IMDB’s words, not mine), you live your truth. The tips listed below can apply to any genre, budget, or cast of actors! All the more reason for you to be on the lookout!

Just because Will Smith’s in it, doesn’t mean that it’s good.

1. You’re not quite sure what it’s about.

This might be the most fundamental tip, so pay close attention! In Blake Snyder’s classic screenwriting book Save The Cat!, he says:

“What is it?” is the name of the game. “What is it?” is the movie. A good “What is it?” is the coin of the realm.

blake snyder, save the cat!, page 2

If you can’t answer the simple question “What is it?” after watching the trailer, is it anything? Is it worth your money? Because what is a movie if not a story? And why would you pay to watch something with no plot?

I know you probably aren’t aiming to be the next best screenwriter, but it never hurts to judge a movie like one–especially when your money is on the line!

2. The main character seems dumber than usual.

Don’t get me wrong, I love Comedy, especially if it’s a good sitcom. But I’d never pay to see Michael Scott on the big screen.

Some characters are dumber than most, and not in an endearing, Forest Gump way…

No, I’m talking about Adam Sandler’s Little Nicky (2000).

A good story usually highlights someone relatable to us in some way: someone we can connect to. If you can tell from the trailer that the character is just a pawn to make dumb plot twists happen, this movie is probably “punching below your weight class”.

Because liking the person we go on a journey with is the single most important element in drawing us into the story.

blake snyder, save the cat!, page 32

Some people can look past the glaring, sometimes unnecessary, character flaws and still enjoy themselves. For that, I admire them. But if you’re anything like me, and you need your character to make sense in order to follow them through the story, I would stay away from bad movies like this.

3. It reminds you of something else.

This one’s pretty self-explanatory, but I should still clarify:

This does not mean that directors and writers should always aim to make something that’s never been done before, because that’s impossible.

Mainly, I’m talking about movies that seem eerily similar to another, to the point where you have to double-check if you’ve already seen it. (Classic example: every Hallmark movie about some city girl returning to her small-town roots and finding love.)

Originality isn’t always possible, but that doesn’t mean that you should sacrifice any attempt at innovation! Beware of lazy writing, it will always create a bad movie.

For example: In an effort to be spontaneous, my friends and I went to see the 2024 remake of Mean Girls. It was some of the laziest writing I’d ever seen; I was quoting the original the entire time. It got a 62% on Rotten Tomatoes. This film critic really sums up my response while leaving the theater:

A shot-for-shot remake would have had more school spirit than this.

Jenny nulf, austin chronicLE, rating: 1/5

4. The trailer feels like the entire movie.

You start the movie trailer, prepared for a 30 to 45-second summary showing the main themes. But then…the trailer is just a very long scene and you ask yourself, “Did I hit play by accident?”

At no point do the directors show you any highlights or important points to look forward to.

Wanna know why they did this? Because there’s no highlight or important point to feature.

These might be the easiest bad movies to spot, yet my family falls for it all the time. I’ve watched plenty with them, and they always give me a headache. I felt like I’d spent the whole time creating the plot myself!

In a way, this problem goes hand-in-hand with the first bad movie tell, “What is it?” You either have no idea what it’s about or you can guess the entire plot arc from the trailer alone.

DON’T. WATCH THESE. It’s not worth it!

5. And the classic: It’s a remake…or the sequel to the sequel.

As I write this, at least 10 different examples come to mind (My Big Fat Greek Wedding, John Wick, every single Fast & Furious…sadly, I’ve already mentioned Mean Girls, etc.).

Answer me honestly: When have they ever made a remake (or the sequel to the sequel) that was better than the original?

I’ll wait. (Seriously, comment it down below. I’d love to be proven wrong!)

Just a few weeks ago, I was subjected to Wonka (2023). It was weird in a way that Gene Wilder and Jonny Depp somehow had never managed (and that’s saying a lot! I still can’t figure out why the writers made him illiterate…?).

I can’t speak for million-dollar-budget powerhouses like The Color Purple (2023) and Star Wars, but generally speaking, the public rarely needs a remake. This rule is especially true now that everyone streams and we have so much at our fingertips.

In my experience, the original is usually so strong and well-written that the remakes/sequels almost cheapen the whole franchise.

I know that some people don’t care–different strokes for different folks! But with the price of movie tickets and snacks nowadays, if you want to save your money, don’t risk it!

The End?

Every time I think that I’ve seen it all, a movie finds a new way to disappoint me. So, this list is by no means exhaustive!

I am just now, after taking many years off, trying to get back into movies and studying their storytelling. If I encounter any new “bad movie red flags”, I’ll update this post.

Stay safe out there, folks!